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“Guilt is the very nerve of sorrow.”

Horace Bushnell

 

No Excuses

Oh, I could say I was a victim of lies.

I was deceived.

I was young.

I was in love for the first time.

 

But my heart knew the truth.

 

I was a thief in the night

stealing precious time,

stealing love,

stealing what was not mine.

 

Many lying years

spent wrapped in self-delusions.

I thought I had learned my lesson.

But he returned years later

and I did it again.

 

I laid my morals aside

like old, dirty shoes

falling back into the same

traps, lies and pain.

The same weakness.

 

At long last, I broke the bond.

But the damage was done.

 

I cannot forgive myself.

 

My two sisters

who I betrayed,

I ask for your forgiveness.

 

 

Tibby Dozier Steedly, July, 2009